I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
