Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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