Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
