$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
lol hangovers are for mortals.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
