i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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