Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Please don't give away my fajitas
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