carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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