Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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