no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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