ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
