Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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