Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
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