dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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