5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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