i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Randomize
