I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
