I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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