You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
