# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Operation Purity has been aborted
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
