Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
