Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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