we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
