He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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