We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
