i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
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