Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
he puts the penis in happiness.
We got so high we made milksteak
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize