What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
