Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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