Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize