how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
