There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
