At least make sure they are 18
Why
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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