I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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