Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Randomize
