I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
So. Much. Porn.
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