I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
