i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
