i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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