new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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