You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize