oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I had to cum in my sink.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
