Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
