i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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