you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
