remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
