you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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