just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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