guys are not supposed to queef...right?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize