New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
