Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize