about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
