So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
This is classic penis vs brain.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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