i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
