somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
